No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize
