Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Randomize
