I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Randomize
