im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize
