how can u be prego again
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
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