Christians are straight up FREAKS
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
Randomize
