Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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