So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
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