she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
