I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
Randomize