i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
