Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
