oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
