Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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