What a fucking waste of an outfit
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
Randomize
