waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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