There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
i out mim tonsoeep
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