I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
Randomize
