well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize