new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
He uses pillows to masturbate.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
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