I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Randomize
