her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
