The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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