Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Randomize
