lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Randomize
