Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
