If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
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