i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
