so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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