Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize