i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
Randomize