The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
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