I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Bring me that man meat
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
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