So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
