Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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