Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
I'm always down for nudity.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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