hotel room ftw
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Randomize
