I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
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