Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Slut skills are useful in every country.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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