And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize
