I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
Randomize