areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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