did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Randomize
