Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
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