Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
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