Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize