im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
I have tasted many bathrooms
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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