I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
