Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
