the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
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