Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
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