what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
