My brain says no but my pants say off.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
He felt like a one man threesome
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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